10.19.17
31,536,000
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry;
I am not there. I did not die.
Mary Elizabeth Frye
My language is normally expressed in the visuals that I create. So for the last 31,536,000 seconds I have not been able to find the words to talk about our life now. I still can’t, but for the sake of our children, I’ll try.
How many days, seconds, moments, have passed since my children’s father left this world. All of the things they knew and trusted ….stripped away. Navigating a new world, without dad. Missed birthdays, milestones, holidays, football games, Dads and donuts and just regular old Sundays.
The pain that surrounds is unfathomable. There are days when it actually takes my breath away. Behind my smile is a girls full of tears, fear, and strength. I keep moving on, wondering when the pain will lessen. People keep saying that “time heals all wounds”, but I’m still waiting.
You would be proud of them. They have been strong. They are also broke, but together we are putting ourselves back together. Their little hearts are full of happy memories and love for you. I will continue to carry on. We will not only survive, but thrive. They want to make you proud of who they are becoming.
Just a reminder Bud, they love you to the moon and back.
